"Trust Me" / Monday - February 1, 1999

SLY : Ba, ba, ba...
LORENA : Tony, quick, get some water!
SLY : Ba...
TONY : You're too young to die.
SLY : BOOM!
TONY : Then again, you're not too young for a noogie with a sledge hammer.
SLY : Hey, hey, hear me now, noogie me later. I just signed the Dreams up for the V-99 song
      -writing contest. I've got to video tape you guys and send it to them as soon as
      possible.
TONY : Alright, Sylvester, I'm very excited--but I'm still so wet they're filming Sea Quest in
        my belly button.
SLY : Hey, hey, hey, did I mention that the winning band gets to perform at the V-99 music
      award--?
TONY : I love this guy. Dance with me.
SLY : Sure I will.
TONY : Alrighty. Da doo doo doo...
MARK : Hey, and I know what to sing. Jake and I have been working on a new tune.
JAKE : Excellent idea, Markus, my man. That song will blow em away.
TIFFANI : Well, let's hear it, let's hear it.
MARK : Well, it's not exactly finished, yet. We've only been working on it for a month.
SAM : So, what have you got?
JAKE/MARK : The title.
SAM : Great. By the time you finish the first verse, we'll all be dead.
JAKE : Hey, no sweat. We'll finish it on time if we have to work twenty-four hours a day.
SLY : Try twenty-five! And the rest of you are gonna eat, drink and breathe music.
      Everything's a drumset. From now on you're a bass guitar with legs. I want you to be...ba
      -dum dum dum duming everywhere. And you--Not another word unless it's sung, got it?
SAM : Oh, sure, like I'm gonna make a complete fool of myself.
SLY : Did I mention there's going to be all kinds of celebrities there?
SAM : WHAT SHALL I WEAR?
MARK : Oh, no! I can't work this week. I have to go with my folks to visit my crazy Uncle
        Victor.
SLY : Yeah, that guy is a wacko. He thinks he's Lassie.
MARK : That's true. But he did pull us out of the burning shed when we were six.
LORENA : Look, Mark, if you don't want to go, maybe your folks would let you stay in the loft.
           My parents'll be home.
MARK : Hey, I'm there.
JAKE : Hey, great idea. And since I hang out at Lorena's all the time, we'll be able to work non
        -stop.
LORENA : Ooh, we'll have so much fun. We can rent movies...
SLY : And work.
LORENA : And play Monopoly.
SLY : And work.
SAM : And order pizza with mushrooms and onions, and anchovies...
SLY : And... Anchovies, mmm... I like it.
SLY : Hey, how come you let Mark drive your motorcycle? Whenever I get near it, you threaten
      to leave a skid mark on my face.
JAKE : Three simple reasons: "A" I like Mark.
SLY : Uh-huh.
JAKE : "B" I trust Mark.
SLY : Uh-huh.
JAKE : "C" neither "A" nor "B" applies to you.
SLY : Hm...so, what are you trying to say?
LORENA : Welcome to La Casa de La Costa. I hope you find everything to your liking. There's
           snacks in the fridge and towels in the cupboard.
SLY : Not to mention a hit song screaming, "Write me! Write me!" You--keyboards. You--
      guitar.
LORENA : Give him a break. Mark just got here! Let's have a little fun.
JAKE : Uh...Lorena, I actually agree with... it.
SLY : Hey! That's Mr. It.
JAKE : Come on, we've got to get to work. We only have a few days.
LORENA : Okay, I understand. That's for inspiration. Come on, Sly.
SLY : What do I get for inspiration?
LORENA : This.
SLY : Okay. I'm inspired to leave. Ow!
MARK : Boy, Lorena's really great.
JAKE : Yeah she is.
MARK : I just wish I could find a girl more like her. I mean she's cool. And warm. And hot.
JAKE : Yeah, well, hang in there. You'll find somebody the right temperature. You've just got to
       be, you know, patient...and, and lucky...and, and... me.
SAM : BOY, YOU GUYS LOOK LIKE IDIOTS. AREN'T YOU EMBARRASSED IN FRONT OF
       THESE PEOPLE? I CAN'T STOP SINGING, CAN SOMEONE STOP ME?
SAM : Thanks, I needed that.
SLY : Hey, that's enough lip lock. I don't hear you guys practicing for the V-99 contest.
TIFFANI : What were we thinking? We stopped for a whole second. A one...a two...
SAM : WE'RE SICK OF THIS. WE'RE SICK OF THIS. WE'RE SICK OF THIS...
SLY : Alright, alright. I get the point. I'll back off. You guys are pros and you don't need me
      hassling you about how it's coming.
SLY : Hey, guys, how's it coming? Is it finished? Is it gold?
MARK : Well, actually, it's not done yet. But we did stay up all night.
SLY : You see? Now that's commitment.
LORENA : No, that's what happens when you start watching the Three Stooges at midnight.
MARK : Coitanly! Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!
SLY : You were supposed to work.
MARK : Well, we did work til midnight. Then Jake split.
JAKE : Hey.
LORENA : Jake! We're all set to go water-skiing after school. You're going to love it!
JAKE : Lorena, I can't today. I've got to finish that song with Mark.
LORENA : Oh. Sure. I understand. I'll just hang out in the loft with you guys.
JAKE : Uh, look, it's kind of hard to get any work done when you're around.
LORENA : What do you mean?
JAKE : Well, you're sort of a... distraction.
LORENA : A distraction? You think Lorena Costa is a distraction?
JAKE : Oh, c'mon, Lorena, it's not like--
LORENA : No, no, that's that's okay. I'll tell you what. You know how you wanted to take me
           out to Paradise Cove to watch that beautiful sunset?
JAKE : Hm-hm...
LORENA : Well, you'll see the whole thing, because I won't be there to distract you.
LORENA : Knock, knock...
MARK : Who is it?
LORENA : It's the distraction. Can I come in or would that be too distracting?
MARK : Lorena, Jake left.
LORENA : I'll kill him! He left without saying good-night?
MARK : Well, he thought maybe you were still a little upset with him.
LORENA : I'm not upset. I just wanted to see him so I could ignore him and make him feel like
           a guilty little cucaracha.
MARK : You're taking this the wrong way.
LORENA : How else should I take it? He called me a distraction.
MARK : He just means that you're...really beautiful, and, it's hard to work when someone so...
        beautiful is around.
LORENA : Beautiful? You really think so?
MARK : Oh, come on, Lorena. You know you are.
LORENA : Well, yeah, but I still like to hear it.
LORENA : Oh, you know, Jake sure could learn a lot from you.
MARK : Yeah, right. Like what?
LORENA : Like how to talk to a girl. No girl likes to hear... "Mm--kiss--good." Instead, a girl
           wants to hear... "I love you, let me kiss you."
MARK : I wish all girls thought I was romantic.
LORENA : Oh, don't be so hard on yourself, Mark. You're a really great guy. And girl would be
           lucky to have a boyfriend like you.
MARK : Any girl?
LORENA : Any girl.
LORENA : What are you doing?
MARK : I just kissed you!
LORENA : I know what you did. I want to know why you did what you did!
MARK : I...I don't know. It was an accident. My lips just slipped.
LORENA : Mark, when you wear heels on a blind date with a short guy, that's an accident.
           When you kiss Lorena Marina Costa...that's no accident.
MARK : I'm sorry... I misunderstood you. I mean, there you were complimenting me, looking
        so...so...
LORENA : I know, I know!--DISTRACTING!
MARK : No, I thought you were unhappy with Jake...
LORENA : Unhappy? I'm in love with him!
MARK : But the fight...
LORENA : Mark, we fight all the time. That way we get to make up all the time.
MARK : I don't believe this. I have just kissed my friend's girlfriend. I don't deserve to live!
LORENA : Look, Mark, you made a little boo-boo.
LORENA : All right, you made the Godzilla of boo-boos. We'll just tell Jake, clear the air, and
           it'll be like it never happened.
MARK : You're right. We've got to be direct. We've got to go straight to Jake.
LORENA : Jake's a mature guy, right? Maybe he'd be cool if we just told him.
TIFFANI : You know, the same thing happened to me, when Jake and I used to go out.
LORENA : Really? How'd he take it?
TIFFANI : He dumped me.
TONY : So I say to you today, is there anyone here who can say why these two should not be
        joined in holy matrimony? Speak now, or forever hold your peace.
MARK : Um, well... I don't know if this makes a difference, but you see, a long time ago, I
        kissed Lorena.
JAKE : That's it--wedding's off. You distraction.
LORENA : Wait, Jake!
LORENA : Blabbermouth!
TONY : Hey, man, this is Jake Sommers we're talking about. The Motorcycle Man is not going
        to let one little kiss turn him into a tantrum-throwing-rattle-shaking-runny-nosed-cry
        -baby.
JAKE : Ah, I can't wait for the big race. There's nothing like riding hard down the road, motor
       oil pumping through your veins, picking bugs from your teeth. It makes me feel really
       macho.
MARK : Jake, I kissed Lorena.
SLY : I got three words for you, cuz: Contusion, concussion, false teeth.
MARK : Jake, I kissed Lorena.
MARK : Down boy! Nice werewolf. Nice werewolf. Nice werewolf...
MARK : Down, Jake! Down! Oh, sorry.
TONY : Come on, Mark. You and Jake are tight. You've never dissed him before. He's going to
        realize this was just an impulsive mistake.
MARK : I guess you're right. He is my friend, and I've got to come clean.
JAKE : Hey, Mark?
MARK : What!?
JAKE : Hey man, what's wrong with you? You nervous?
MARK : Nervous? No, no. I'm not nervous. No.
JAKE : Good. I'd hate to see you nervous.
MARK : It's just these lyrics. I'm not sure you're going to... like them.
JAKE : Oh, relax, Mark. They're lyrics. I mean, it's not life or death, you know.
MARK : Let's hope not.
JAKE : What?
MARK : Uh...I, I, I said, let's take it from the top. And, and don't stop playing until I'm
        completely finished...no matter what you think, okay?
JAKE : Alright, whatever you say.
MARK : No, swear. Swear on your bike.
JAKE : Hey, I never swear on my bike. I'll swear on my mother. Alright, let's go. One...two...
       three...four...

(MUSIC CUE : VOCAL AND GUITAR TRACK 1
MARK : IT'S NOT EASY--BUT I'LL TRY--
  IT'S THE TRUTH CAUSE I CAN'T LIE--
  IT JUST HAPPENED -- I KNOW IT'S
  INSANE--I'M SORRY--BUT I KISSED
  LOREN...NA.)

MARK : I said don't stop!

(MUSIC CUE : VOCAL AND GUITAR TRACK 2
MARK : YOU'RE MY FRIEND--I NEVER HILL--
  DO IT AGAIN, SO PLEASE DON'T KILL... ME.)

MARK : So...what do you, what do you think?
JAKE : I think you better run.
MARK : Jake, it was an uncontrollable impulse!
JAKE : Well, here's another uncontrollable impulse!
TONY : Easy now, Jake. Somebody do something!
SAM : I've got him! I've got him!
SLY : It looks like he's got you.
TIFFANI : Okay now, Jake, why don't we take a nice deep breath and count to ten. Ready? One,
           two...
TONY : People, my arms are going numb!
LORENA : Jake, be reasonable. Can't you see how guilty Mark feels?
LORENA : It was an innocent, little kiss. It was nothing like this.
JAKE : Oh, hey, guys. When did you get here?
SLY : Aw, now this is what I like to see. Peace on Earth. And everyone getting along with
      their fellow man. So when are you guys writing that song for V-99 so we can get rich?
JAKE : Hey, you can forget that. I'm not writing no song with him. In fact, I'm not even staying
       in the same room with him.
MARK : Jake, c'mon man, I'm sorry. You gotta forgive me.
JAKE : You betrayed me, Mark. I can't ever trust you again.
MARK : Jake...
JAKE : Forget it. Our friendship is finished.
MARK : He's never going to forgive me.
LORENA : Just give him time, Mark.
SLY : Look, friendship is based on trust. All you have to do is show Jake that he can trust you
      again.
MARK : Like how?
SLY : You steal his wallet and then you give it back to him like you found it.
MARK : That helps. Thanks a lot, cuz.
LORENA : That Jake is so stubborn. He drives me crazy.
TIFFANI : We have to come up with a way to show him he's overreacting.
TIFFANI : Now remember--as soon as Jake come in, Sly, you kiss Sam in front of Tony.
           Then, Tony, you get furious, and pretend to end your friendship with Sly.
TONY : Frendship? With Sly? I'm an actor. I can do anything.
SLY : So, as actor to actor...how does Sam like to be kissed?
TONY : Oh, well, um, she likes me to take her in my arms and then I tip her back slightly and
        then I... Hey, get out of here, man!
TIFFANI : Oh, ready? Set? Kiss!
TONY : Hey, Sylvester, what do you think you're doing? You kissed my girl!
SLY : Huh? Oh, oh, yeah, right. Uh...sorry. Uh...what?
TONY : Why, you two-timing-double-talking-four-faced-facsimile of a friend! Why would you
        do something like--
JAKE : Hey, Come on! Hey! If you've got differences sit down and work them out. I mean,
       whatever it is, it can't be worth wrecking your friendship over! Especially, if it's a
       routine you stole from Gilligan's Island!
TIFFANI : Oooops. You saw that one?
LORENA : Jake, I still think you're being as stubborn as a pig!
JAKE : Mule.
LORENA : That, too.
TIFFANI : Look, Jake, he made a mistake. Don't you think you're over-reacting just a wee bit? I
           mean, Mark's your chum, your partner, your comrade, your amigo, your little buddy.
JAKE : He kissed my girlfriend.
TIFFANI : Oh, picky, picky, picky.
SLY : You know, I wouldn't ordinarily beg, but... Please, Jake! Please, please finish the song!
JAKE : Look, Winkle, as much as I love playing "King and the Slave Boy" the answer is still
       no.
TIFFANI : Maybe we should give them some privacy.
TONY : Yeah. And maybe this time we can come up with a plan that the Skipper didn't figure
        out.
MARK : Hey, Jake...
MARK : Come on.
MARK : Fine. If that's the way you want it. I'm not going to beg you any more. I'll be around if
        you change your mind.
MANGLER : Hey Tinkerbell--you just stepped on my friend's foot.
JAKE : Sorry. I hope there's no brain damage.
MANGLER : Those were brand new sneakers! Weren't they, Stomp?
MANGLER : Stomp says wipe them off.
JAKE : Uh, tell, Stomp, no thanks.
MANGLER : Stomp says do it, or he's going to have to beat you up.
JAKE : Why don't you beat each other up--and make the world a better place?
MARK : Hey--you mess with him, you mess with me, too.
JAKE : Uh, Mark, this isn't a game. I mean, these guys can really hurt.
MARK : Look, I know you've written me off, but I'm not letting you face these two jerkwads
        alone.
JAKE : That's really cool man. I guess when it comes down to it, you are a friend.
MARK : Do you mean it?
JAKE : Yeah, but you don't have to fight to prove it.
MANGLER : Hey, so what's it gonna be? One nose job or two?
MARK : Two.
TONY : Hey, this is a great song. How'd you guys finish it so fast? Did you compose in your
        sleep?
MARK : Sleep? Are you kidding? We stayed up all night to finish that.
TIFFANI : Well, the most important thing is that you guys are friends again.
MARK : Yeah, I just wish I didn't have to get a black eye to prove it.
JAKE : Hey, if you'd have gotten out of my way, I never would've hit you.
MARK : That's okay. At least we won the fight. Well, you won the fight. I sort of watched from
        the floor.
JAKE : It's cool, man. I mean, at least you were honest enought to cop to what you did. You're a
        good friend.
SLY : You guys can't go on camera like that. V-99 is not about to give an award to the Black
      and Blues Brothers.
LORENA : No problem! A little cover-up here, some blush-on there--no one will ever know
           the difference.
JAKE : Uh, hold it. Jake Sommers doesn't do blush-on.
SLY : Alright! Let's win this contest!
JAKE : You got it.
MARK : One...two...three...four...
(MUSIC CUE : WE STAND TOGETHER
MARK : I'VE SEEN THE WAY GIRLS COME AND GO
  THEY CAN SLIP RIGHT THROUGH YOUR
  HANDS
JAKE : EVERYBODY NEEDS SOMEONE YOU KNOW
 IT'S SO HARD TO BE A MAN
MARK : WHEN YOU'RE STALLED YOU NEED A
  JUMPSTART
  OR YOU'LL RUN ALL OUT OF GAS
  YEAH EE
JAKE : WE ALL NEED THE KIND OF MACHINE THAT
 WAS REALLY BUILT TO LAST
MARK : WELL HEY IT'S A JUNGLE OUT THERE
JAKE : IT'S DOG EAT DOG
MARK/JAKE : IT'S SO UNFAIR
  WE STAND TOGETHER
  THROUGH THICK AND THIN
  WE'LL BE THAT WAY TILL THE BITTER END
  WE'LL GO ON FOREVER
  WE STAND TOGETHER, TOGETHER, TOGETHER
MARK : ONE THING YOU GOT TO REMEMBER
  BE THERE FOR EACH OTHER
JAKE : HE'S NOT HEAVY YOU KNOW
MARK/JAKE : HE'S MY BROTHER
MARK/JAKE : WE STAND TOGETHER
  THROUGH THICK AND THIN
  WE'LL BE THAT WAY TILL THE BITTER END
  WE'LL GO ON FOREVER
MARK/JAKE : WE STAND TOGETHER, TOGETHER
  WE STAND TOGETHER
  TOGETHER THICK AND THIN
  WE'LL BE THAT WAY TILL THE BITTER END
  WE'LL GO ON FOREVER
  WE STAND TOGETHER, TOGETHER
        WE STAND TOGETHER
  WE STAND TOGETHER

-THE END-