Aids Love

AIDS LOVE

It's the toll of the disease, running through my body.
I ask myself, why this happened to me and I still have no answer.
Days go by and I don't ponder my fate and then suddenly out of the blue it hits me like a wrecking ball that has just destroyed another building in Brooklyn.
How many people will be affected before a cure can be found?
Who knows and more importantly who cares?

Some people are thinking of ways to hurt us.
If they continue to try and destroy us, we will only become more powerful than they can imagine.
It's a small picture to them, when in reality they have seen at least five of us a
day without knowing it.
We are not all nelly nor do we flaunt it! If you ask me, you'll get the truth. I am not ashamed of my fate.
I am a survivor.
Sometimes I try to think back to when I wasn't a statistic, what did I do?
How did I feel about the circumstances then?
I was uneducated in the matter and didn't know anyone that would express their hurt, anger, frustration and countless other forms of emotions.
Kept inside because of society's hate.
A great majority of us deal with this unfortunate disease, in one form or
another.
It comes out in hate toward innocent people.
Sometimes we even choose to soak in self pity.

Then there are some of us who deal with it and turn to positive choices.
We raise thousands of dollars for those who are worse off.
We comfort their minds with a book or we try to help ease the pain, just by being present.
What a scary feeling it must be to lie there, incapable of feeding yourself,
not being able to walk any longer nor being able to speak.
Would I be able to look into my companion's eyes without breaking down, knowing that I need to be the strength for both of us?
Probably not.
My heart would express the memories we've spent together and I would be assured that we will see each other in another life.

Written by: JTB (Johnny Emerald)
April 23, 1997
copyright 1997

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