Off the Top of My Head Navigator

Off the Top of My Head
The home page of this Psycho-Babble.

Off the Top of My Head, Vol. V #1
Click to view the first "Rant" that ran from 6/4/98 through 7/1/98 at the top of Michael's Tripod Homepage. Witness Michael's comments about his page, a little bit about people he knows, and see him mocking that after five years his decision to relearn HTML!

Off the Top of My Head, Vol. V #2
The second rant, still "BEFORE" Michael decided to rename it the internet version of "Off the Top of My Head". Witness Michael's psycho-babble about absoultely NOTHING! WOO!

Off the Top of My Head, Vol. V #3
The first official "Off the Top of My Head" on the internet. Oddly enough, the people Michael knows only FROM the internet have offered MONEY for psychiatric treatment after this rant. Wow.

Off the Top of My Head, Vol. V #4
WTF are you doing READING THIS PIECE OF GOD FORESAKEN PIECE OF HORSESHIT! ARE YOU FARKING NUTS?!??!?! ARE YOU!?!?!? ... ... ... ... [calms down]... sorry, now: This sucks, don't read (or even click). But the whole point of OTTOMH (sucking or not) is to log all of the thoughts you have, even if they're unemotional and nothing. Alas... Michael hopes to God that he never has to force you all to endure another piece of schlock like this... really. Hell, I want to print this retard piece of garbage out and wipe my ass with it... dammit!

Off the Top of My Head, Vol. V #5
Next up? Will Kyle be muttering "Oh my God! They killed Michael!" ... who knows? Some people may.

"Having a penis is like having a friend that always wants to play." Some guy on Premium Blend... sure, I don't know the guy's name, but Jesus Christ he was funny. Hello and welcome to another edition of the root canal like Off the Top of My Head. It's summertime and I'm anti-social, so I have LOTS to talk about--- I swear (Just wait until school begins, you'll be really frightened)... Claire Danes is perhaps one of the few just extremely unbelievable actresses around. What a hottie, my friend(s). Just awesome. I'm not being a COMPLETE pervert about it either.... no _REALLY_... oh forget it... on most levels I am... Welcome to hell ladies and gentlemen... to your right, the guys standing upside down in piles of shit, to your left? A television with nothing but Michael Langan's life on it. The really GOOD people get choice one... sorry, it's so HARD to be cynical when you have nothing to complain and be cynical about. Damn this world or something... the Mask of Zorro is a pretty spiffy movie folks, if you haven't seen it--- see it. A hell of movie.... God, I have NOTHING to say. This sucks... why the hell did I even start writing this? Oh yeah... people are weird. I've got a "friend"... or something. His name is Tim. Well, Tim has a little deal--- he RANKS his friends. Say hello to Number, drumroll please... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I said drumroll please... ... ... [drumroll] That's better... Say hello to Number 10,502! WOO! And I didn't even think Tim knew that many people. That's pretty damn amazing. Okay, let me get off on a rant here for a moment. Being one of the FEW guys who has taken the time to actually get to KNOW and _SPEAK WITH_ Tim, I feel kind of retarded being rated as a friend and basically informed by someone else that not only does Tim rate his friends, but I'm no where near the top. Geez, should I remember that next time I use _MY_ gas to give people rides home from school? I mean, I never assumed that I'd be ranked with my peers on "what a friend I am." I'm not really offended, which is weird... I just need something to rant about... and I wanted to say that amazingly my parents were right, you _DO_ compete with everyone else out there... and God damn, this rant sucks. So--- new subject.... Ramms+ein's "Sehnsucht" CD was recently purchased by yours truely as well as a brand spanking new computer that I'll be using in the coming weeks.... Maybe I should erase that worthless rant... you think? I mean, it was all mocking someone else who _WAS OFFENDED_ that she was "ranked" and well, was "(not) happy" that she was three... and not because she wasn't in the top two. Oh well, mocking the "ranking" and the fact that someone was offended is over... I'm indifferent... and sadly, that's the most important thing I have to say... or something... Man, I hate writing about nothing, it's like completely retarded, I suppose. Alas. News on the Candice front: Not a damn thing. Not one phone call, and hell--- I took Kris' advice and actually called. Ak... Speaking of Kris, my friend from Seattle, he's now on the "Let's Find a Girl Who's Perfect for Michael" World Tour. Basically, Kris is going out and well, looking for a chick that's perfect for me. Apparently Zoe, Melissa, Roseanna and some 19 year old model would be perfect, if not for the fact that they live in WASHINGTON and I live in Georgia. Wow, Kris is SOOOO spirtual. [rolls eyes].... at least that time I didn't have to TELL you the last line was sarcasm or mocking like the whole "Ranking" thing... odd, I still say that drags this all down... The WWF brings "In Your House XXIII: 'Fully Loaded'" to Pay-Per-View next week, and with the former A.C. Conner, now D-Lo Brown as the WWF European Champion. Hot damn! McMahon pushes a guy I mark out for! ... Your ass better call somebody! --- whoops, wrong faction. Regardless, some cool stuff going down their... including HOPEFULLY seeing Owen Hart beat Ken Shamrock, and if that happens I will PERSONALLY mark out for a while--- why do I get the feeling that it won't? ... Gini (#3, the idea of hers I was mocking... sorry. =P ) has basically told me she "wants to get to know me." I'm lost. You see me TWICE, both times barely over a half hour and the span between them about six months and you talk to me two or three times and automatically I'm something spiffy? Well God damn, as cool as that sounds, it's a little odd for me being asked "Would you like to get to know me better in person, or would you rather not?"... I mean, how do you answer that? I've never really TRIED to get to know people well by asking--- you just do. You find yourself doing things. You can't force things, I suppose and oddly I can't seriously tell her that... I mean, she's an interesting girl--- but one I don't know. God damn, traditionists suck (that, of which, I am)... Kris thinks I'm being stalked by Jeannine. Hmmm. IM from no where on 07.16.98 from her too (she never IMs me, mind you) "i have a friend that thinks you are fine.....u work at winn dixie right?"... this coming not three or four hours after I see Jeannine while working at Winn-Dixie (home of my paycheck). Hmmmm... weird. Apparently it was her friend "Sandy" who had to abruptly go before sharing with me that Jeannine had the runs (at the beginning _AND_ end of the conversatiton)... what this leads me to believe is well, Sandy is trying telling me that well, someone likes me --- and basically she's making her FRIEND look bad? Coonections? One can only assume... Wow, maybe I've used some facts to salvage this horseshit I use as an excuse for an OTTOMH. Sadly, this is no where NEAR up to par with the stuff I usually put out... [weeps]... For now, I'll save my pain and everyone elses... and just end the babble about nothing... for now... (kind of like a Sienfeld episode)... God, maybe school is good for something--- MATERIAL, namely... so open your ears and clear your mind and see what's Off the Top of My Head... oh yeah...



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