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COUNSELING  FOR

CHRISTIAN FAMILY LIFE

  Part 1

CONFERENCE MANJERI, INDIA, Nov. 18 th. 2000

Given by bro. C.B. Beekhuizen, Holland

  The non-Christian family life

  In the non-Christian family live there are often many problems between the parents and their children. Sometimes it start in the beginning of the wedding. Some parents have to much influence in the new live of the just married couple. Problem rise up between the man and his just married woman. The man try to make an other person of his wife, such as his mother perhaps. That’s not working of course! The mother, when there comes children, try to make their children such as their mother or father. That’s not working too. Each man, woman or child are an unique person! God create man and woman apart as each others help full other side, a companion. Both are unique!

  The problem is that people without a real understanding about God’s will for family live, have their own culture and meaning about that goal. Therefore it’s need that all men understand God’s will for their live. All people need repenting and a real understanding Who is the Lord Jesus Christ!  (Titus 2:11-3:8)

  Typical signs of real faith

  We read in Acts 10:1-8 and 30-44 the repenting of a non-Christian believer. How is this possible? Well, the Roman soldier showed love to God’s people and helped the poor among the flock of Israel. He respected and believed Yahweh and was following His commands and builder the Jewish synagogue. Such a devoted activities to God’s people is always God’s work in men. It was a real repented man, but without the Holy Spirit indwelling in him! (see Phil. 2:13; John. 15:16; 17:6-8; Acts 8:16; 9:15; 13:48; 19:2). From nature every men are rebellious! (Rom. 1:19,20; Eph. 2:1-3; 2:14-16; 3:10-12; Acts 15:14-21; Luc. 7:1-10; Rom.1:19,20; 2:14-16). Let we read now the verses carefully:

  vs. 2a  The whole family devout God as Creator and that they are   God fearing.

vs. 2b  The head of this family was helping the poor people of God in   his place

vs. 2c  We see that he and his family prayed only to God, and not to      the Roman idols.

vs. 3-6   God sent a messenger from heaven, but he preached not the Gospel! (Gal.1:8)

vs. 7   There were God fearing servants too in house!

vs. 8    They were listening to the heavenly message.

vs. 30  He was serious to know God’s will by vesting.(He took              time for the Lord).

vs. 35  God listen to those! (See Acts 13:1-3 ; 1:12-14; Mat.  15:21-28).

vs.42   The Gospel (John 3:16,33,36;5:24,25;                                     Acts.13:44–49;17:22–31,34)

vs.44   The sealing of the Holy Spirit (Eph.1:3;Acts                             19:1–7;18:24,28; Acts11:15–18).

2)            The “repentance to life” 

(see also Acts 11:18)

  vs.15     By preaching the real and whole Gospel.

    vs.16    The baptism; 1 Peter 3:21 and Rom.6:4.

  3)   The Foundation    (Acts 2:38 – 47)

  vs.38               1) Repentance, 2) be baptized, 3) receive Holy Spirit.

  vs.39               The promise is for the whole family (Acts 16:31)

  vs.40               It is God’s will that we stand apart of this world.

  vs.41               It is needy to accept the Gospel personally!

 vs.42 And to stand firmly on the right foundation                        (Eph2:20–22;1.Cor.3:10).1 Thes.1:4 –10. Be an example to others!

4)   Family Life    (Eph. 5- 6:1 – 4)

  vs.1           The Lord’s command is discipleship! (John 15; Mat.28:19;    Mark.1:17–20).

vs.2              Walk in the love of Christ (Rom 5:5; Col 3:12–17)

vs.3 –6          The old life must be put out (Eph 4:17 –25)

vs.7,11          Be not a friend of the worldly man /woman (6:6: 1 John 2:14)

vs.9,10–13     Bring forth the fruit of the Spirit! (Gal.5:22)

vs.14 –16       Awake in this dark time! Be active, not sleepy!

vs.17               Read God’s Word, know God’s will for you.

vs.18               Be full of His Spirit! (Not the spirit of this world)

More about Family Life (Eph. 5:19:33)

  vs. 19,20     Be thank full and singing hymns to God in the name of the   Lord.

vs. 21,22        Be humble to each other Col. 3:10 –21;4:2 –6.

vs. 23a            Know your place and responsibility in own family and      assembly. Mark 10:1-16

vs. 23b            Know your place and responsibility in the world.    Acts15:14,17,21;1 Tim. 3:1-7.

vs.24,32         The marriage and family life is an example of Christ and     His bride!

vs.25               What is real love? See John 10:11;15:13 and John 15:14.

vs.26,27         Goal? Purify his own body! Through God’s word!

vs.28 –30       Love each other as your own body! See Prov.31, the ideal   household

vs.31               It’s need to left your own family when you married (Gen.   12:1; Ex. 4:18-26)

vs. 32,33        God’s love is God-fearing too, but not the same as to be  afraid (Gen.3:10)!

5) Education within the Christian family

(Communication between parents and children. Eph. 4:7-16)

vs. 14-16       The goal of Christian education is our children to help to be a complete man in Christ. The other goal is children to learn to listen to the education of the Holy Spirit, Who will teach in the Word of God (Rom. 8:12-17). When children are to long under education of their parents, then spiritual growing are stopped. (Gal. 4:5). When fathers bring the Law only and not the Gospel, then children will be a slave, not a priest and king for God the Father! (Gal. 2:18-20). Therefore the apostle Paul pray for the believers that the Lord Jesus and the Holy Sprit by His love may be indwelling in the believers, fill the whole house! (Eph. 3:16-19).

  Eph. 6:1-4

vs. 1-3     Children, be obedient to parents, there is a promise 

                (Dt 5:16;Col. 3:20)!

vs. 4                Education is needy, but not in bitterness and hardness    (Dt.6:6,7,20; see Ps. 78:4; Prov. 19:18; 22:6; 29:17,18; Heb. 12:1-15;   6:10-12).

6)            Extra information

(about the rich of “ poor” men who believe in Christ. See Luc. 1:46-53; 1 Cor. 2:26-36)

Luc. 7:1-10     Here we see the result of helpful work for the Lord

Gal. 1:6-10     Because God will that believers helped the poor believers

2Cor. 9:6-15  The Lord Himself was rich, but He came to earth born in a  very poor family

More information:

Acts 11:27-30 ;2 Cor. 8:1-5; 12-15; Rom. 15:25-33

Acts 20:32-37 ;2 Cor. 8:9

1 Cor. 13:3    Your help must be out of love! 1 Thes. 1:3

Rev. 3:7-11

Rev. 2:2-4      The Ephesieers had much knowledge, but less love!

Rev. 3:14-19  The believers from Laodicea too!

1 Pet. 1:22     Therefore, purify yourself in spirit, soul and body for the Lord and His people!

1 Pet. 1:3-9    Because there is a rich live in Christ in heaven for God’s people!

So we learned:

“...being rooted and established in love ... to know Christ’  love, that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Eph. 3:17,19).

“ To Him be glory in the Church (and our families) in Christ Jesus ...” (Eph. 3:21a).