THE KARATE KID PART II - Daniel and Mr. Miyagi are back. This time, they're off to Japan, where Miyagi's father is dying. They also meet up with Miyagi's rival Sato. Miyagi broke tradition and announced he would marry the woman who was arranged to marry Sato. Miyagi fled to the United States, the woman never married, and Sato wants to kill Miyagi. Sato's nephew picks fights with Daniel. Eventually Miyagi and Sato decide to fight. However, a big storm destroys everything and brings the two of them together. Awwww, how sweet! Goofy sequel lacks the charm and fun of the orignal. Strange though, didn't Miyagi's wife die in a Japanese internment camp? "Don't know. Never been attacked by tree."
THE KETTLES IN THE OZARKS - Marjorie Main stars as Ma Kettle, in the eighth film in the series. This is the first film without Pa (Percy Kilbride). Ma and the kids go to visit Pa's brother Sedge. Sedge is as lazy as Pa. He even has two indians who do all of his work for him! Sedge's farm is in danger of being taken over by the bank. To make money, he rents out the barn to a group of men. Unbeknownst to him, the tenants are making moonshine. This film is ok, but Percy Kilbride is greatly missed. Somehow Ma and Pa's children have grown to a total of 16!
THE KETTLES ON OLD MACDONALD'S FARM - This is the ninth and final film in the series. Marjorie Main reprises her role as Ma. Pa is now played by Parker Fennelly. The Kettles move to a new farm. Their old home is now being run by a young couple named Brad and Sally. Sally's father doesn't want her to get married because he doesn't think that she's cut out for farm life. It's up to Ma and Pa (mostly Ma) to teach her. O.K. comedy with Fennelly doing a decent job as Pa. But Percy Kilbride is once again greatly missed.
THE KILLING KIND - A young man named Terry returns home after spending two years in jail for involvement of a gang rape of a girl, for which he didn't really participate. Terry's a bit disturbed. He resents his accuser, and most women in general. His mother tends to baby him. He then starts killing women - including a young Cindy Williams. Pretty decent flick features a guy who not only kills women, but kills a cat and a rat as well. John Savage plays Terry. His chocolate milk-giving mother is played by Ann Sothern.
KING KONG (1976) - Jeff Bridges stas in this 1976 remake. Jessica Lange (giving her best Marilyn Monroe impression) costars as the heroine, and object of the big ape's affection. Charles Grodin, as the promotor, who brings Kong to New York City, looks funny in his moustache. The movie runs a bit long, but it moves pretty good. Lange does look quite lovely in her skimpy outfits. And God bless modern day filmmakers - three words - King Kong's penis!
LADY CHATTERLEY'S LOVER - Sylvia Kristel stars in this sequel to YOUNG LADY CHATTERLEY. Her husband goes off to war - WWI, I believe. He gets injured. He's paralyzed, and his dinger doesn't work. He invites his wife to take on a lover. Little did he suspect it would be the gardener! Well, a passionate love affiar ensues. Eventually, her husband starts walking again. But it's too late. She's pregnant with the gardener's child, and decides to run off with him. An OK little flick featuring both male and female nudity.
LADY GODIVA RIDES - This is a 1968 exploitation film starring no one recognizable. Lady Godiva has an affair with Tom Jones, shoots her husband, gets sentenced to death, escapes, and hops aboard a ship to America. When she arrives, she becomes a prostitute in the old west. This no budget film is filled with topless women and neverending dance sequences. Believe it or not, even the nudity gets old. Someone do something, please! Don't miss the aerial shots of the boat. It looks like it was filmed in a bathtub!
THE LAST CHASE - This film is set in the near future. Lee Majors stars as an ex-race car driver. For whatever reason, all cars have been outlawed for the last 25 years. With a high school companion (Chris Makepeace) Majors takes off from the Boston area, in a rebuilt Porsche. The duo are heading towards California, where some new "free" society has started. Government bad guys send an old, retired pilot (Burgess Meredith) to track him down and blast him off the road. Though the plot is ridiculous, this movie is a lot of fun. It's hard to believe that Meredith would want to stop Majors, since he mostly agrees with him anyway. Meredith even sacrifices his life to save Majors and Makepeace. Look for Sammy Snyders (Jamie Benjamin from THE PIT) in a small role.
THE LAST MAN ON EARTH - Vincent Price stars in this horror film. Price plays Robert Morgan, a man living as the last man on Earth, in a world of vampire-like beings. The "vampires" more resemble the living dead from the Romero films. They don't move very fast, and don't do much but bang Price's home with boards. "Morgan, we're gonna kill you!" Price spends his days cleaning up dead bodies and hunting down the vampires. Nice little flick, which was more-or-less remade a few years later as THE OMEGA MAN.
THE LAST STARFIGHTER - Lance Guest stars as Alex Rogan, in this 1980's sci-fi flick. After beating a video game, he is suddenly recruited by the game's recruiter - an alien from another world! It turns out that the game was created to seek out "Starfighters" to help fight the real war in space against Zur and the Kodan armada. Alex's copilot is a lizard alien with a funny laugh, named Grig. A pretty decent flick.
LIANNA - A woman stcuk in a marriage with a cheating husband, inadvertently has an affair with her psychology professor. Did I mention that her teacher is a woman? Her husband kicks her out. Lianna struggles with the realization that she's a lesbian. An interesting drama. Lianna's very obnoxious son has a few funny scenes. "So my mother's a dyke. Big deal!"
THE LIFE AND TIMES OF GRIZZLY ADAMS - Dan Haggerty stars as James "Grizzly" Adams. It takes place sometime in the 1800's. He heads into the wilderness after being accused of a murder he didn't commit. While there he becomes friends with all of the animals, including a bear he names Ben. He also meets an indian, and saves his life. Eventually it's proved that he didn't kill the guy. But he still chooses to stay in the woods. This is a rather silly flick, but I found myself strangely drawn to it. I just couldn't turn away. It somehow held my interest! There's virtually no dialogue, only narration. Shortly after this film, a TV series followed.
THE LITTLE DRAGONS - Long before the THREE NINJAS came the Little Dragons. When the 12-year-old daughter of a wealthy businessman is kidnapped, it's up to a brother duo karate students to rescue her. If they didn't, no one would. The police in this hillbilly town are beyond inept! Ann Sothern's two grown kids are the kidnappers. They plan to ransom the girl and take their mother to Las Vegas with the ransom money, so that she can see Wayne Newton. Silly little film, though its very watchable. The boys' guardian is their grandfather, named J.D.
LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRARIE - This is the pilot to the long running TV series. The Ingalls family moves from Wisconsin to Kansas - in the middle of nowhere. Their only neighbor is Mr. Edwards - played by Victor French. How Mr. Edwards eventually ended up in Minnesota, along with the Ingalls, is a mystery. While in Kansas, they build their own home, deal with indians, wolves, and a fire, and then get forced off their land by the government. Such is the harshness of frontier life. Decent pilot, but not as much fun as the series. Don't miss Mr. Edwards as Santa Claus!
LITTLE HOUSE: BLESS ALL THE DEAR CHILDREN - Some woman loses her baby during childbirth. Desperate for a baby, she kidnaps Laura and Almonzo's child, Rose. The woman hops a train and heads for home. Luckily, a bum saw them get aboard. Laura, Almonzo, and Mr. Edwards head out in hot pursuit. After catching up with the kidnapper and retrieving Rose, they then try and find a runaway orphan named Samuel. Believe it or not, with the aid of some divine intervention, they're able to find him. O.K. drama, but Michael Landon is missed. Shannon Doherty has a small role. Interestingly, this story takes place during Christmas time, in Minnesota. Yet no cold or snow ever appears!
LITTLE HOUSE: THE LAST FAREWELL - This made for TV feature was the final installment of Little House On The Prarie. Michael Landon wrote, directed and starred. Charles (with that ridiculous blonde hair) and Caroline Ingalls return to Walnut Grove to visit Laura and Almonzo. What the hell kind of name is Almonzo anyway? Some rich guy named Lassiter has somehow managed to buy up all the land of Walnut Grove. When the citizens refuse to work for him, Lassiter brings in the U.S. Army to forcibly remove them. Reluctantly, they decide to leave, but not before blowing up the entire town, thus ending the long running TV series. As was typical with the show, once you start watching it, you just can't change the channel! With a few exceptions, none of the show's actors did anything else noteworthy. Look for a young Shannon Doherty in a few scenes.
LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS (1986) - This is a musical remake of Roger Corman's 1960's film. Rick Moranis plays Seymour, a guy working in a flower shop. He finds this plant that (unbeknownst to him) comes from outer space. The only thing that will make it grow is human blood. He starts out by feeding it blood from his fingers. But once the plant gets to be enormous, it requires full humans to eat. Seymour decides to kill a sadist dentist (played by Steve Martin). Eventually, the friendly plant announces his plan to take over the Earth. Will Seymour be able so destroy the plant and save his girlfriend Audrey? Wonderful movie, directed by Frank Oz. The music is very memorable, and in some cases, quite funny. Martin has a great autobiographical song about his sadistic dentistry. John Candy, Christopher Guest, and James Belushi all have cameos, along with Bill Murray, playing a pain-loving dental patient.
THE LONE RANGER: JUSTICE OF THE WEST - Clayton Moore and Jay Silverheels star as the Lone Ranger and Tonto, in this "telefilm" comprised of three separate Lone Ranger episodes. In the first episode, the duo tricks three convicts into revealing where some stolen gold is stashed. In the second story, the duo retrieve some stolen gold in order to help build a school, in memory of a woman who was killed. In the last story, the duo go after a gang that blinded an old sheriff, who was about to retire. These are your typical Lone Ranger episodes. And as expected, they're a bit campy, but they're very good. Look for Denver Pyle in a small role in one of the episodes.
LOSIN' IT - A young Tom Cruise and Shelly Long star in this teenage horny movie about a group of four kids who run off to Tijuana for a few days of ... well, to get laid. Wackiness ensues as they visit a whorehouse where the lounge singer has a great, foul-mouthed act! Watch for the scene where "Big Dave" goes into the drugstore to try and buy Spanish Flys from an employee who doesn't speak English. This is one of the better films of its genre.
THE LOVE BOAT - This is the original pilot to the long running TV series. None of the original crew stuck around for the series. As with all Love Boat episodes, you already know the plot. People come on board, meet total strangers, and full all in love. Some couples get on board to rekindle a romance with their spouse. It's all here. Don Adams and Florence Henderson play a married couple. He's trying to kill her. Tom Bosley and Hal Linden are also aboard. Gabe Kaplan falls for a foreign model named Binaca. Based on this, I'm surprised the series took off. And unlike Captain Stubing, the captain here is a real unfriendly jerk. O.K. comedy with a few scattered laughs.
THE LOVE BOAT II - This is the second pilot of the long running TV series! This one features an entirely different cast. However, fans of the series will recognize Isaac, Gopher, and the doctor. Guest stars include Robert Reed, Bert Convy, and Kristy McNichol. This pilot (which is much better than the original pilot) features some dramatic moments as well. McNichol plays a 13-year-old with raging hormones, who is lusting after Gopher!
THE LOVE BUG - Dean Jones stars as race car driver Jim Douglas, in this, the first of the four Disney "Herbie" movies. Douglas buys a VW Beetle. His assistent Tennessee Steinmetz (Buddy Hackett) names the car Herbie. Though it can't talk, Herbie has a mind of its own. Herbie wins race after race for Douglas. In the final race, Douglas competes against the devious Peter Thorndyke, in a "winner takes Herbie" race. This G-rated flick is a good entertainment for all ages. Hackett is funny, playing the part of Douglas' slightly inept sidekick.
LOVE, LUST, & ECSTASY - Ajita Wilson stars in this foreign sex film. When her older husband becomes temporarily handicapped from a boating accident, she goes off and stays with an aspiring artist. Her husband hires a photographer to spy on her. The photographer gets a lot of candid photos of her fooling around with the artist. He then tries to blackmail her for money and sex, in exchange for the photos. This typical sex film features lots of nudity. Wilson has kind of an odd face also. Though there is a lot of nudity, this film is more of a drama, rather than a comedy. Strange, for whatever reason, the boating "accident" happened on purpose. The guy drove himself into a cliff!
Back To The Walrus Movie Homepage
A & B Review List
C & D Review List
E & F Review List
G & H Review List
I & J Review List
M & N Review List
O, P, & Q Review List
R & S Review List
T, U, & V Review List
W, X, Y, & Z Review List
Email The Walrus