~The Cutting Edge~
My brother gave me
His Swiss Army knife,
'Cause he said he
Couldn't use it.
He should have given
It to his wife,
I'll find some way
To lose it.
"What's this for?
I said, flipping up
A claw-like blade.
"Oh that's a versa-till.
You can seed potting soil
Better than a spade."
"And this one with the
Funny little holes?"
"Oh that's a cheese slicer..."
"Don't tell me (I said),
Let me guess...
It just cuts swiss."
It had corkscrews and
Scissors and every kind
Of opening device...
All kinds of manicure things,
And a snap-jaw blade
That was meant for
Catching mice.
This knife was far from subdued,
And exceedingly sharp.
To find a way to carry it,
The bulge may be misconstrued.
(I'd look like some kinda
Bottom feeder...
Similar to a carp.)
So I gave it to my uncle...
(Must be some sort of family thing.)
He put it in his tackle box,
And uses it almost every Spring.
So that's my story and
I'm sticking to it.
When my brother asks,
I shower it with praise
And hope he won't pursue it. :)
MEBH/@Copyright 7/99
